I’m 63 and don’t want a relationship – I only get a buzz from no-strings sex

DEAR DEIDRE: I’VE had more women than Ken Barlow actor Bill Roache – and he reckons he’s had over a thousand.

I’m a 63-year-old man and since I lost my virginity — aged 16, in the early hours of the morning behind a bicycle shed in Manchester — I’ve had countless lovers.

I don’t have a type. I’ve slept with women of all ages, colours and creeds. As long as they’re fit, healthy, and up for it, I’m happy.

I’m always honest that I only want no-strings sex, not a relationship, and I treat them respectfully during and afterwards. I won’t take their number, but I do thank them and call a cab.

I love the thrill of the chase and having sex gives me a buzz like no other. I’m an expert lover and know how to satisfy a woman.

But once I’ve finished, I do feel a bit down and empty, and I soon need to do it again.

My mates call me the “super stud”. They all have frumpy wives who’ve gone off sex, and I know they’re jealous of my ability to score. I’ve never married, or had kids that I know of (I’ve generally been careful) and being free and single suits me.

I’ve tried dating, but I get bored having sex with the same woman more than a few times.

Sometimes I feel a bit lonely, especially during the lockdowns when I couldn’t go out to meet anyone.

And occasionally these days, I need a bit of “help” to get going, even though my libido hasn’t dulled, and I’m in pretty good shape.

I’m not unhappy but my brother says I’m a sex addict and need help.

He says it’s time I settled down before I become a sad old man.

DEIDRE SAYS: The fact you’ve written to me suggests you’ve taken your brother’s words to heart and some part of you feels you’ve missed out on the joys of love and commitment.

Having sex releases endorphins and it can be addictive. It can also be a way of avoiding dealing with other issues.

The relationship counselling service Relate describes sex addiction as any sexual activity that feels “out of control”.

If you feel your urge is controlling your life, then you may have a problem.

My support pack on Sex Addictions will tell you more.

I’m also concerned that you may be risking your health – and that of your partners – by having so much sex with many strangers.

Counselling could help you – see my support pack about this.

You can also contact Sex Addicts Anonymous (saauk.info) for support.

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