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‘Twisted mindset’: Slater Young under fire for remarks on men fantasizing about other women

Trigger warning: The story contains themes of sexual harassment. 

MANILA, Philippines – Filipinos online slammed Pinoy Big Brother: Unlimited winner Slater Young following his comments on men fantasizing about and sending photos of other women while in a relationship in a recent episode of the skypodcast with his wife, Kryz Uy. 

The controversial comments were made in response to a letter sent to the couple by someone who was worried about her boyfriend admitting to “fantasizing [about] other women” and having group chats with his friends about it. 

In the podcast episode that aired on May 8, Slater defended the boyfriend, saying he was “honest” about the matter. 

“It’s just a matter of fact that there are many other women more attractive than you or just as attractive as you…. Those group [chats] that send photos of girls and fantasizing [about] it, it’s normal,” he said in a mix of English and Filipino. 

Sharing his experiences with such group chats, Slater added: “Siyempre, as part of that group, sakyan mo lang. Wala naman, hindi mo naman gusto talaga. (Of course, as part of that group, just go along with it. You’re not actually interested.)”

In reaction to the backlash, Slater on Friday, May 12, posted on his Instagram Story a comment from a Facebook user urging others to listen to the entire episode.

Eto po. Pakinggan bago mag-judge (Here. Listen before making judgments),” he wrote, adding a link to the podcast episode and tagging Cosmopolitan Philippines, who earlier wrote an article about his remarks.

On Saturday, May 13, social media users said the comments were “triggering,” and just because such groups chats were normal “doesn’t mean it’s okay.”

They also reminded Slater that “women are not toys for entertainment” and remarked that his comments reflected “toxic masculinity at its finest.”

Facebook user Katrina Quizan said that the act of fantasizing was “the same as coveting” for someone, saying it’s a “twisted mindset.”

Sociologist Ash Presto also reminded Filipinos that such acts were punishable by the Safe Spaces Act as gender-based online sexual harassment, saying Slater’s comments “[encourage] and [empower] sexual predators while doing the opposite for women and girls.”

According to a 2020 Plan International survey, 68% of girls and young women in the Philippines have experienced online harassment on social media. 

Slater and Kryz told the letter sender that she should “stop making [her worries] a big issue” if her boyfriend did not do anything wrong. 

“I think you should use that time and energy instead to maybe, not the right word to say, but make yourself more attractive in that sense. Use that time and effort for yourself,” Kryz said. 

Social media users also slammed Kryz for “agreeing” with her husband’s statement and asked her if she would allow such acts if they were done to her.

Meanwhile, other users said that while admiring someone was acceptable, fantasizing about someone while in a committed relationship could “hurt their partner’s feelings,” adding that it’s a “violation of trust and commitment.”

What do you think of Slater’s comments? Share your thoughts and tag us @rapplerdotcom on Facebook or Twitter. – Rappler.com 

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