The only good thing about the new Madden 24 trailer is the ability to truck, then taunt, Kirk Cousins

Josh Allen is the cover athlete for this year’s annual installment of EA’s Madden franchise. That’s a big deal for a rising young star who has helped turn the Buffalo Bills from perennial doormat to Super Bowl contender.

But it’s not the honor it once was, because the game itself has become yet another product of EA’s broken assembly line. Each year, the company pumps out a new game and extolls the virtues of all the changes its made. And each year the gameplay is roughly the same, the career and general manager modes underwhelm and, despite the hype, a bunch of us long for the days of the Sega Dreamcast and NFL2K.

Here’s the latest trailer for the Madden 24 gameplay which, per tradition, may or may not reflect the actual experience anyone has with the sticks in their hands.

You were made for this

Pre-order #Madden24 today https://t.co/6PIfUHWy4r pic.twitter.com/qgLcqlCmR7

— Madden NFL 24 (@EAMaddenNFL) June 7, 2023

I mean, great. Grand. It’s a Madden game. The rosters are updated. The graphics are a little better. There’s a bunch of basic gameplay that will, without fail, glitch horribly and eat up a full week of your Twitter or TikTok browsing. There’s —

Wait a minute. What’s this?

OK, you’ve got Kirk Cousins.

And he’s throwing an interception. Cool, cool.

Oh and then you, at least in theory, get to play as Micah Parsons and toss his Pizza Ranch-loving (expletive) into the turf?

AND THEN LECTURE HIM AFTER?!?!?!

OK, never mind. Maybe Madden is good again. I mean, probably not, but the trailer features the NFL’s favorite bread bowl of a quarterback being below average at football and summarily being punished for it. It can’t be all bad.