Comic Book Onomatopoeia and Their Real-World Counterparts

Ha!
A mistaken vocal inflection produced by the waitress when you mentioned you have a boat.

Oh!
Often produced involuntarily when you realize you are much kinkier than you thought you were.

Wham!
Your drunk uncle describing the impact of his 2018 Dodge Ram during his first DUI.

Twang!
A combination of traditional values and piss water boycotts.

Thwack!
Often heard in repetition and completed between three and five minutes with a lackluster partner.

Grrr!
An internal reaction to your mom’s curfew rule (you’re thirty-two).

Rip!
A cool maneuver performed by a single nostril; occasionally from a mirror, more commonly from a urinal.

Slam!
Da-duh-duh.

Da Duh Duh
Let the boys be boys!

Vroom!
Your drunk uncle describing the acceleration of his 2004 Ford Taurus during his second DUI.

Pop!
The quick removal of a foreign object when you realize you are not as kinky as you thought you were.

Aaugh!
Charles Brown’s reaction to the death penalty for the torture and murder of Lucy Van Pelt.

Ugh!
Your mom made meatloaf again (you’re still thirty-two).

Pssst!
Often produced by suspicious men in long coats, usually your uncle.

Crack!
You only have five dollars and the urinal is being used anyway.

Bang!
Your drunk uncle describing the front fender of his 1996 Pontiac Sunfire during his third DUI.

Whoomp!
Commonly followed by the expression made when you find what you were looking for.

Yaah!
An exhilarating scream produced only when you’re a 2004 presidential candidate.

Bzzz!
The indication of a perimeter breach on your sober uncle’s ankle monitor.