Kristi Noem is the latest Republican to show the party has no shame left
Kristi Noem is on quite a roll lately. The South Dakota governor—a once-rising GOP star—is irked that people are calling her unpublishable names simply because she murdered her dog for being a skosh too dog-like. And now she has further ‘splaining to do after more rancid bologna emerged from the new book she wrote to bolster her VP bona fides, as she’s starting to face backlash with her appearances being canceled.
As you’ll no doubt recall, Noem recently decided to destroy a mangy, useless, unacceptably dangerous, rotten-on-the-inside piece of moldering trash on an apparent whim. But enough about her political career. She also murdered her frisky, fun-loving dog Cricket, and everyone—with the possible exception of Donald Trump—is utterly repulsed by the story, which she (oh, sweet Jesus, what bichon frisé hell is this?) wrote down for posterity in a book.
But before the no-nonsense, action-oriented governor decided she had to shoot her pet or get off the pot, she was inventing stories in her head about her foreign policy experience. Turns out she’s not afraid of adorable pups or North Korean tyrants with bad haircuts. Which means, as Trump’s vice president, she’d be ready for anything!
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