Welcome To Mississippi. Have A Swig Of NyQuil

Mississippi Republican State Senate President Pro Tem Terry Burton does not have a drinking problem. He has a breath spray problem.

He got his butt arrested last month for his second DUI in two years. He ran his truck off the road at 10:00 pm after attending a concert. He killed a stop sign. They took him to the police station and he blew “drunk.”

He says he had some drinks that morning but that he quit drinking in the afternoon. You know, because it’s healthier to drink in the morning.

So, here’s his story and he’s sticking to it.

“I had a coughing spell after all the powder and dust blew from the air bags deploying,” Burton said on Friday. “I took some cough syrup. … It was Nyquil, that was all I had in my bag, had nothing else in the vehicle to drink. … I used breath spray because my mouth felt like cotton.

That right there is a pretty good Mississippi story, if you’re drunk when you told it.

Now here’s the best part: The judge ruled, “Yep, that’s what happened.”

Justice Court Judge Wilbur McCurdy (no, I am not making up these names) ruled that the NyQuil and breath spray caused a false positive on the breath-o-meter.

So, State Senator Terry Burton walked out of the courtroom, stuck some NyQuil in his hip pocket and some breath spray under his cowboy hat, and headed over to the saloon to celebrate.

Well done, Mississippi.