Surprise: Slay the Spire 2 is bringing 4-player co-op when it hits early access on March 6

Did you feel that? The echoing reverberation of thousands of collective hours of roguelike deckbuilding thudding into place ahead of us on the timestream? That's because Slay the Spire 2 just locked in its early access release on March 5, and—surprise—it's bringing four player co-op on launch day.

I'll give you a moment to rotate the magnitude of this in your mind.

Announced via a new early access trailer, Mega Crit confirmed co-op's inclusion with a lovely animation of The Silent meeting a thoroughly unlovely end. But after her ensuing resurrection, she's joined by the Necrobinder, Regent, and Ironclad to embark on her next attempted Spire-slaying as part of a team.

Oh, the Defect is back, too. Congratulations to orbs.

"Brave the ascent on your own, or play with up to four players and face the Spire together in the all new co-op mode," Slay the Spire 2's freshly-updated Steam page says. "Discover multiplayer-specific cards, powerful team synergies, and carry your friends (or get carried) to victory!"

I can't help but notice that Mega Crit has conveniently omitted "force your friends to wait while you map out the next-turn implications of your available cards at a glacial pace" from its description of the experience, but maybe I'm projecting.

From the glimpses of co-op gameplay included in the trailer, it looks like the multiplayer mode is pretty fully featured: You and your comrades can plan your route through the tower with collaborative map-sketching, splash each other with potions, watch as you each deliberate between a treasure chest's relic choices, and—presumably—point and laugh when your Ironclad buddy gets a little overzealous with hitting themselves.

Considering how easily the first Slay the Spire could casually demolish hundreds of hours of a player's time, I fear for what the potential synergies of four-player Slay the Spire might do to humanity's overall well-being. The global economy's already on shaky enough ground without this particular productivity hit.

That said, if Slay the Spire 2 topples everything when it launches in early access on March 5, it certainly won't be the worst way we could've gone out. At least there'll be some cool poison builds.