I Accepted Money For My Wedding Gift, Then Eloped. Am I Wrong?
In a recent post shared with r/AmITheAsshole (AITA), Reddit user Iu/mportant-Writing889 asked, “AITA for accepting money from my parents for my wedding then eloping?”
The poster, who was deemed Not The Asshole (NTA) by fellow Redditors, explained that her brothers each got given $50,000 after they graduated college as a downpayment for their homes.
She, however, did not receive this money ― even though she also graduated college.
“I asked about it and they said my husband should provide,” the poster said.
“I wasn’t married. I still lived at home.”
Then, she found her husband
Three years after graduation, the poster reveals that she met the man who would later become her husband.
“We dated for a year and then we got engaged. My parents were overjoyed,” she shared.
But she was baffled as to why, on announcing their wedding, the couple were given $50,000 by her parents.
So, “I took the check and we eloped. We then used the check for a downpayment on a house. My husband had a similar amount saved up so we are in a good spot with equity,” she wrote.
Her parents were pretty unhappy
“My parents are furious that they didn’t get a big wedding for all their friends and family to attend,” OP revealed, saying that her parents insisted the money was meant for the wedding.
But by the post author’s account, she had technically had the wedding and had money left over. “Accurate in my books,” she said.
Her brothers are on her side, she added, before asking the Reddit audience if she was in the wrong.
Most people praised the bride
“They didn’t expect your brothers to use that money for a big wedding, but you have to. They wouldn’t have helped you get a home unless it was through marriage, but your brothers didn’t have that condition and just got the money. And they expected you to have a huge wedding so that they could have fun,” one commenter said.
“If, for example, this concerned money set aside for education, I’d judge you in the wrong. But 50k for a wedding when your brothers got that same amount for a home is outrageous. Seriously, what the heck were they thinking?” another wrote.
“Gifts don’t come with strings attached. Methods of control come with strings attached. Good for you on cutting the strings,” yet another Redditor opined.
“They give you $50k for your wedding. You used the money for the wedding. They didn’t specify how much you had to spend.”
What do you think?
