A Teen’s Prom Dress Ultimatum Has Redditors Questioning Her Mom’s Motives — & Giving the Best Advice
‘Tis the season! Prom season, that is. And with there’s the potential for glitz, glam, and core memories, there’s the very real possibility of tears, drama, and teenage catastrophes. Unfortunately, the latter option could be the fate of one 17-year-old who joined the “Am I The A—hole? (AITA?)” to vent about her prom situation.
What Happened?
This teen who originally posted (the “OP” in Reddit lingo) said her mom wants her to wear her sister’s prom dress.
“I told her that I didn’t want to do that because my sister’s dress is not my style and it wouldn’t match with my boyfriend’s outfit,” OP said. “My mom told me that she didn’t have enough money to pay for my dress and that my sister’s dress was the only option.”
Well, that’s not entirely the case. OP said she has her own savings, and offered pay for her own dress.
“She told me that she didn’t want me to do that because she wanted me to save my money,” OP said. “So I just decided that since I wasn’t allowed to buy the dress I wanted I just wouldn’t go.”
OP’s mom was upset that she didn’t go, calling her “selfish” and “unfair.”
“She’s mad at me right now and told me that I’m hurting her feelings by choosing not to go which I don’t necessarily see how,” OP said. “I don’t see why she wouldn’t let me pay for my own dress when I could afford it instead.”
Now OP is asking, “AITA for not wanting to go to prom because my mom wants me to wear my sister’s prom dress?”
Reddit’s Reaction
Reddit has mixed reactions, but the top comment with 4.6 thousand upvotes says that OP is not the a—hole.
“OP was willing to pay for the dress with her own money,” the Redditor said. “I went to junior prom I think? Didn’t like it that much, didn’t go to senior prom. I have no regrets. But for some people prom is a very important moment.”
You (just like OP) might be wondering why the mom is acting this way. Plenty of Redditors jumped to the conclusion that she’s been stealing from OP’s savings account and doesn’t want her daughter to see that. And while we have seen similar instances on Reddit, we’re just not convinced that’s what happened here.
It’s more likely that she wants to teach her daughter to spend her money wisely.
“She probably doesn’t want her kid who is about to graduate and presumably go off to college to waste hundreds of dollars on a dress she’s only going to wear one time for a few hours. That’s smart financial advice.”
Which is totally fair. It is a lot of money to spend for very little time. Ultimately, Redditors say there’s a simple — and sustainable! — solution here. They offered up comments such as, “Hit the thrift shop. They often have really cool formal gowns for a fraction of retail price,” and “A lot of times these thrift store dresses were only worn once.”
She can also check Facebook Marketplace, Buy Nothing/Sell Nothing groups, and rental companies.
“Also there are a lot of charity events that GIVE away beautiful dresses and make sure they fit you correctly. Google it!”
And does this sister even want her gown anymore? Some people certainly hold onto theirs for sentimental value, but if not, perhaps OP could sell it and use some of that money on her new (or secondhand!) gown.
Regardless, Redditors say OP should reconsider for her own sake.
“I hope you decide to go, no matter what dress you have,” one person said. “It’s a great way to celebrate being a senior and to make memories with your friends.”