A Non-Horse Girl’s Guide to Horse Sports
Just how many ways can people compete on horseback?
Whoever is in charge of horses’ PR right now is doing a great job. I can’t open a FYP without cantering into instructions on how to dress like a horse girl; Bella Hadid is kissing a real-life cowboy; and two gorgeous equine models — named, correctly, Reneigh and Chardonneigh — have appeared on consecutive Beyoncé albums. We are living through one enormous yeehaw.
For the casual horse fans — say, those of us who only tune in when Olivia Rodrigo wears Chloé stallion pants that once appeared on Sex and the City — the world of horse sports can be overwhelming. Just how many horse-oriented pastimes are there? Which are the most fun to watch? Ahead of the Kentucky Derby — a major moment for horse buzz — here’s a cheat sheet to all the ways you can enjoy competitive horseriding. Giddyup!
Equestrianism
Vibe: Stables, using riding crops outside the context of S&M, competing in Connecticut on the weekends
Dress code: Chaps, jodhpurs, velour-coated helmets
Celebrity fans: Kendall Jenner, Mary-Kate Olsen, Kaley Cuoco, Bella Hadid
These are the tried and true horse girl sports. We’re talking trotting, posting, galloping, French-braiding your horse’s hair. There’s a wide range of equestrian events. Some are basically just beauty pageants where gorgeous steeds compete over who has the shiniest rump (or whatever). Others showcase some kind of skill — in dressage, riders guide their horses through a series of tests that show off the animal’s training and athleticism; for show jumping, the horse has to clear a bunch of hurdles within an allotted amount of time. Both dressage and jumping are Olympic events — as is cross country, which takes place on an obstacle course with more natural terrain that stretches a few miles long.
On an international level, all these sports are regulated by the International Federation for Equestrian Sports, which is based in Switzerland. The FEI’s main bread and butter seems to be the more traditional competitions like dressage and showmanship, but the organization has also defined a handful of other disciplines like reining (a western version of dressage), endurance (a long-distance race not to be confused with cross-country), and tent pegging (where you have to pick something up from the ground while galloping by it). There are also some quirkier ones: Vaulting, which has become a popular circus act, involves performing complex gymnastic feats atop a moving horse. Yes, there are costumes involved.
Polo
Vibe: Gin cocktails, old money, popping your collar
Dress code: Pastel blazers, straw fedoras, espadrilles
Celebrity fans: Joan Crawford, Sylvester Stallone, Tommy Lee Jones, all the royals
Polo is one of the world’s oldest sports, and also the backdrop of that one Gossip Girl episode where Blair and Chuck experiment with opening their relationship. Actually, polo is due for another big TV moment: Prince Harry, whose family are long-time polo fans, is apparently working on a Netflix docuseries about professional polo.
In terms of gameplay, polo works kind of like a high-speed round of croquet, where the players — there are four on each team — have to use huge mallets to clack the ball through a pair of goal posts. Naturally, the American iteration of the practice comes with its own incomprehensible set of vocabulary — the 7.5-minute time periods are called “chukkers.” Also, the horses they use are widely referred to as “polo ponies,” but they’re not actual ponies — a lot of them are at least partially Thoroughbreds.
Polo has been around for long enough that a few hybrids have developed — horseball, the only team horse sport recognized by the FEI, is described on Wikipedia as a four-way cross between polo, rugby, netball, and basketball. There is polocrosse (polo and lacrosse). The only other equestrian sport where teams directly face off against each other is Pato, a popular Argentinian pastime that’s like basketball on horseback.
Cowboy-ing
Vibe: Country music, line dancing, lassos, Cowboy Carter
Dress code: You know the deal. Boots, spurs, fringes, and all other walks of yee-haw attire.
Celebrity fans: Beyoncé (aesthetically), Bella Hadid, Bella Hadid’s boyfriend
To be clear, this is not an official term, but we’re going to use it to talk about all the sports that come from American cowboys, because boy are there a lot. The sheer scope of athletic activities devoted to organizing cows with horses is kind of astounding. We don’t have time to get into them all, but here are a few to help you wrap your head (and spurs) around it.
First, the two western-style competitions recognized by the FEI: Western pleasure, where a bunch of horses and riders slowly trot around an arena while being judged on their movement, calmness, and other seemingly arbitrary metrics. There’s also reining, which is like western riding’s version of dressage — you guide your horse through a pre-set pattern of movements to show off how well it listens to you, and your score basically depends on the intensity of your horse-cowboy bond.
That brings us to Mr. Hadid, also known as Adan Banuelos. Banuelos trains and shows horses for cutting, which tests horses and their riders’ ability to herd cattle — specifically, to separate (or “cut”) one cow away from a herd. Those incredible photos where he and Bella look like they’re in a western-themed rom-com? Those were taken at the American Performance Horseman, an event that celebrates cutting and reining. Bella herself is actually shaping up to be the rare crossover horse athlete — though she’s mostly done equestrian riding, earlier this year she competed in a cutting show in full cowgirl gear, prompting speculation that Banuelos had gotten her into western riding. The girl (and her horse) can do both.
Is any of this what goes down at rodeos? Of course not. Though rodeo skills also revolve around herding cattle on the horse — and come from the same Spanish and Mexico-influenced cowboy traditions as other western competitions — it’s actually an entirely different type of competition. Generally speaking, rodeo events are a lot more hands-on and intense than what goes down at western horse shows — competitors do things like lassoing a calf from atop a horse, leaping off a horse to wrestle an ox, and hanging onto a bucking horse for dear life. (As you’ve probably guessed, rodeos are also a lot more controversial — a lot of animal rights and welfare groups have accused them of animal cruelty, and some regions have banned them entirely.) There’s also the tamer barrel race, which is basically just the rodeo’s version of a timed obstacle course.
Racing
Vibe: Mint juleps, whiskey, socialites, Secretariat, high-stakes gambling
Dress code: Pinstriped suits, floral dresses, HATS!!!
Celebrity fans: Tom Brady, MC Hammer
Any archeological fresco will tell you that humans have been racing horses basically as long as we’ve had societies — Ancient Greece, Rome, and the Byzantine Empire were all big into chariot racing, which was an event in the original Olympics (in addition to mounted horse racing). Though some people still race horses from an attached carriage, the type you’re probably most familiar with is the one with famously small men riding Thoroughbreds with weird names around a track. Sometimes they do it with obstacles on the track, which is called a steeplechase.
The Kentucky Derby is, of course, the most prominent event in this realm, and it kicks off peak horse-racing season: The Triple Crown, which consists of the Derby, and then the Preakness Stakes and the Belmont Stakes, which both happen in early June.
Another major component of horse-racing: Gambling. Horse betting has been legal in the U.S. since the early 20th century, and people seem to find it super exciting — partially because the payouts can be huge but also because races last something like 60 seconds, making the whole experience a hefty shot of adrenaline. According to a guy on Quora who calls horse betting “heroin for the analytically minded,” there’s also a deluge of statistics that’s not typically available in other sports — you can study everything from meteorology to investment theory to maximize your winnings. In short: Small guys, long names, and the chance to lose (or win!) a shocking amount of money. See you at the tracks!
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