New girlfriend took advantage of my grief and swindled me out of thousands
DEAR DEIDRE: After losing my wife, I finally met someone I thought I could find happiness with again.
But now I realise she completely hoodwinked me with her attentive sex routine and loving talk.
As soon as I’d given her my savings, she ghosted me. I now realise I’ve been scammed and I am devastated.
I’m 54 and my late wife, who died in an accident 18 months ago, was 50.
We were married for 25 years and had two children who are now adults.
I was in a terrible state after my wife’s sudden death and felt extremely lonely.
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A friend persuaded me to join an online group for widows and widowers, so I could talk to others who’d understand.
Through the group, I met a woman, 45. She seemed lovely – kind, sensitive and easy to talk to. She told me she had lost her husband to cancer.
She also mentioned a son, who had drug issues, and how hard it was to deal with him alone.
Over time we grew close.
I felt guilty after the first time we had sex but when she told me I was the first man she’d met who had made her believe she could love again, I really began to think we had a future.
Then she began talking about how she’d found a rehab unit for her son, but she couldn’t afford it.
It cost thousands.
I offered to lend her the money and she, at first, refused. But she kept saying how worried she was, and eventually, ‘agreed’ to take my money – £3,500.
A week later, she suddenly said she wasn’t in a good place for a relationship, and promptly ghosted me.
She’s blocked me on all social media and her phone.
I can’t believe anyone could be this calculated and cruel. I feel so hopeless and humiliated.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: This woman has taken advantage of your loneliness, which is despicable.
Scammers deliberately target people who are vulnerable and by joining this group this woman knew she would meet fragile people.
Thankfully, you found out relatively quickly. Do lean on your friends and family, they will want to support you and time will make this easier to bear.
But do think about bereavement counselling if you’re finding it hard to cope.
My support pack on Bereavement explains where to find support.
It may not be possible to recover the money, but it’s worth talking to your bank and contacting Action Fraud (actionfraud.police.uk).
And if you haven’t already, contact whoever runs the website, so this woman can’t do this to anyone else.