Ronda Rousey explains why she was so crushed after Holly Holm loss: ‘I cared about that title more than anybody ever has’

Ronda Rousey never wanted to be anything less than the best.

That mentality was drilled into her from a very young age. She first wanted to be a swim champion and then eventually followed in her mother’s footsteps to become one of the top judokas in the United States. She finally achieved her ultimate dream when she became the first ever UFC women’s bantamweight champion, then defended that belt six consecutive times.

However, her reign ended with an emphatic thud once Holly Holm knocked her unconscious at UFC 193 back in 2015, and that was the last time Rousey touched gold as a professional fighter. Nearly nine years later, Rousey reflected on that moment and explained why losing that night affected her so profoundly.

“I cared about that title more than anybody ever has,” Rousey said at a Q&A during her recent book tour. “It hurt me more than anybody that’s ever been hurt by losing it. That’s why I was able to defend so much for so long.”

As much as it pained her losing that fight, Rousey knew that was always a possibility, but that’s a price she was willing to pay to achieve her dreams.

She knows it’s hard for somebody on the outside looking in to really sympathize with the level of agony she endured after losing that fight. Of course, Rousey knows she’s not alone in feeling devastated after such a crushing defeat, but not everybody operates at that same level, which is why it’s hard for those people to understand how much it hurt her.

“It’s hard for a lot of people to understand, to have something mean that much to you,” Rousey said. “It’s like, ‘Why are you so upset? It’s just a fight.’ Well, it’s just somebody else’s fight to you, but I think one thing that’s really important if you’re going to be a fighter at an extremely high level, or an athlete, or someone who runs a business, or anything like that, you have to be willing to get your heart broken in order to put every fiber of your being into something.

“You’re going to know whether everything you have is good enough. I think that a lot of people have this tendency to preserve themselves and not put everything out there, and when it doesn’t work out, you’re like, ‘Well, it wasn’t everything I had, I could have done it if I gave it everything I had.’”

Rousey’s willingness to sacrifice everything allowed her to become a dominant UFC champion, but that same passion drove her into a deep depression after the loss.

“It’s because I care that much,” Rousey said. “Caring more than the other person. Caring more than anybody else is an advantage, but it will be what comes back to bite you if it doesn’t work out.”

Following that loss, Rousey essentially disappeared from the public eye. That was definitely by design.

She didn’t want to see anyone or have anyone see her in that state, but Rousey credits her husband, veteran UFC heavyweight Travis Browne, for pulling her out of that pit.

“It was a lot of crepes and chocolate and crying and World of Warcraft, and just not rushing it,” Rousey said of how she dealt with the loss. “I just allowed it to suck for as long as it needed to, but I also would have become a Golem cave creature if it wasn’t for my husband.

“He was like, ‘You need to go outside and get some coffee.’ I’m like, ‘There’s TMZ cameras,’ and he made me go outside and have all the TMZ pictures taken. He made me go outside and bite the bullet and get their damn pictures, because they were like camping outside my house for two weeks.”

Even after she ventured outside again, Rousey didn’t escape reminders about the fight, her loss, or the knockout, but at least she can talk about it now.

“While I was getting my root canal because I got all my teeth knocked out, I was forced to lay there and watch TV, getting four root canals at once, and TMZ comes on blasting me going to get coffee,” Rousey said with a laugh. “Like, ‘Look at this loser getting her coffee!’ I was like, ‘This is hell.’”